


Reluctant

by elirwen



Series: Pornalot 2017 [3]
Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, First Time, Fluff, Fluff and Smut, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-22
Updated: 2017-08-22
Packaged: 2018-12-18 14:57:39
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,120
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11876931
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/elirwen/pseuds/elirwen
Summary: Merlin is scared to move things further. And then Arthur helps.





	Reluctant

**Author's Note:**

> Written for the second week of Pornalot 2017.

“Night is still young. Want to come up for tea or coffee or something?” Arthur asks.

Merlin wants to says yes. He really does. He loves spending time with Arthur, and in between their busy work schedules they don’t really have much time for dates, so every moment spent together is precious. But he knows what that ‘something’ Arthur so nonchalantly dropped at the end of the sentence means. 

“Sorry, gotta run. I have to be up early tomorrow,” Merlin says, smiling apologetically. 

It’s not a lie outright, but it’s not a complete truth either. While he considers nine to be an early morning, he doesn’t need to be in bed before midnight to get enough sleep. 

“Too bad,” Arthur says, not trying to hide his disappointment. 

He pulls Merlin close, pressing a sweet kiss to his lips, trying to prolong their time together and maybe convince Merlin to stay a bit longer, to come up with him after all. 

“I really need to go,” Merlin says, his nerves stopping him from giving in. 

He knows he’s making things worse by not talking to Arthur, but he’s not ready to share. Not yet. 

 

*

 

“You know I wouldn’t push you to do anything you wouldn’t want to do, right?” Arthur asks after a short lull in conversation as they look over the Thames in all its tidal glory. 

“Of course I know that,” Merlin says, tensing, his heartbeat spiking.

Arthur shifts even closer taking Merlin’s hand in his. 

“It’s just that every time I suggest meeting at mine, you get all tense and jittery. So I thought I should make some things clear,” Arthur says, squeezing Merlin’s hand in reasurance. Or maybe to stop Merlin from running away. “I don’t mean to drag you to bed the moment you set foot in my flat. There are no code words in those invitations. I just really want to spend more time with you. Is that clear?”

“Yes, sir,” Merlin says, trying for a joking tone to mask his embarrassment. 

 

*

Arthur didn’t lie when he promised giving Merlin time. They made it through five evenings of innocent cuddling before Merlin signals his wish to take things further by deepening a their kiss and grabbing Arthur’s bottom at the same time. 

The movie still plays in the background, but they no longer pay it any attention, their focus entirely on one another. The weight of Arthur’s body pressing Merlin into the couch feels much more comfortable than he ever imagined. The touches and kisses make his whole body tingle, his mind lost in a pleasurable haze. 

“Bedroom?” Arthur asks and it hits Merlin like a cold shower. “Or not,” Arthur says with a soft smile, pushing Merlin’s hair off his forehead. 

It’s the tenderness that does it, giving Merlin the courage to finally tell Arthur what is holding him back.

“I’ve never…” he starts, his voice betraying him. “You’re my first.”

“Really?” Arthur asks, surprise evident in his eyes.

Tears well up in Merlin’s eyes, the fear of being laughed at for being a 29 year old virgin showing its ugly head, but he nods in confirmation.

“I’d never guess,” Arthur says, squeezing himself in between Merlin and the backrest, settling in for a cuddle. 

More tears spring up and Merlin has to bite his lip to stop himself from sobbing, the revelation bringing relief so strong his body can’t cope. 

“Come here,” Arthur whispers, nudging Merlin to turn and wrapping him into a tight embrace, letting him soak his shirt and muffle his sobs against his shoulder.

 

*

 

Water cascades over his body. Normally he’d feel himself unwind after a long day, but not today. Today his insides are twisting themselves into knots, his breath coming out in fast heavy puffs as he leans against the wall. Suddenly their scheduled first time doesn’t seem like such a good idea even if it did mere two days ago during their surprisingly honest and open talk.

A waft of cold air hits his back as Arthur enters the spacious shower cubicle. Merlin can’t stop himself from tensing even more.

“I knew leaving you alone wasn’t a good idea,” Arthur says, pressing his fully naked body against Merlin’s. 

Merlin’s brain short-circuits, washcloth falling from his hand. Arthur wraps his arms around Merlin’s middle.

“Is this okay?” he asks, pressing a kiss to Merlin’s neck.

“Yeah,” Merlin manages to breathe out. 

“How about I blow you to help you relax?” Arthur says, all innocent. “It would be like those movie teasers you like so much.”

“Oh my god,” Merlin breathes out, his cock hardening.

He doesn’t resist when Arthur presses him against the wall. He gasps at the cold, leans forward into Arthur’s chest before he eases himself back, getting used to the feel of the tiles against his back. Arthur doesn’t waste this time, leaning in for a kiss that soon turns rather filthy, their hard cocks brushing against each other, making Merlin feel weak in the knees.

With one last playful nibble at Merlin’s bottom lip, Arthur drops to his knees, grinning up at Merlin through the steady spray of water. There’s no way Merlin’s gonna last long. Not with Arthur looking at him like this. And then Arthur wraps his hand around his cock and sucks its head into his mouth and all of Merlin’s higher brain functions shut off entirely.

Standing becomes rather a difficult task, his legs threatening to give out with every clever swipe of Arthur’s tongue. He blindly grabs at something to help his balance, shutting off the water as his hand closes around the lever, pulling it down. Arthur doesn’t seem to mind, swallowing even more of Merlin’s cock and gently kneading his balls in his hand. 

“Fuck,” Merlin gasps, gripping the lever harder. “I’m gonna…”

Arthur pulls away mere moment before Merlin comes, his hand on Merlin’s cock never stilling its motion as it milks every last drop of come from Merlin, letting it fall on Arthur’s chest. Merlin lets go of the lever and leans on Arthur’s shoulder instead, bending forward as the pleasure slowly turns into strangely satisfying discomfort. 

“Enough,” he whispers when it gets too much, his cock too sensitive to handle Arthur’s touch. 

Only then Arthur slumps against Merlin’s thigh, his forehead pressed to Merlin’s belly, and starts pulling at his own cock. He breathes out little ‘ah’ noises, the puffs of breath hot on Merlin’s skin, and before Merlin’s sex addled brain manages to even think about some form of reciprocation Arthur is spilling his load all over the wall in between Merlin’s legs, a broken moan falling from his lips. 

Carding through Arthur’s hair Merlin says, “can’t wait to enjoy the whole movie.”


End file.
